KobemeanfaceEye of the Tiger meets Bubba Gump.

The Lakers won the NBA Finals last night and I watched exactly zero seconds of the game, so I’ll spare you any type of analysis on the game. What’s most important in the Lakers finally winning this anti-climatic title is that it officially means the end of the Kobe Bryant mean face. There was no more ridiculous facial expression going on in sports this year than the Kobe mean face. He looked one part serial killer, one part Bubba Gump, one part dude checking his lower teeth for food. It was fun to listen to Mike Tirico try to talk his way around the stupid expression on his face and instead just marvel at the focus and determination that Kobe expressed.

What’s up with NBA players and their stupid facial expressions? According to the highly precise Urban Dictionary, “mean mugging” is to look or glare at another person with a scowl, or other antagonistic facial expression, with malicious intent, hoping to provoke a response from the intended recipient.

The king of the mean mug? None other than Mr. Kevin Garnett.

GarnettScary, huh?

If I’m commissioner David Stern, this offseason I try and pass a rule giving technical fouls to people who either make really stupid facial expressions like the one KG and Kobe were making, or just T up everybody who pounds their chest to proclaim they have heart or pops the name on the front of the jersey, so people can read the team name that they play for. These things are annoying and stupid.

Piston Celtics BasketballTechnical.



Not that I think even Stern would be able to get a rule like this passed, but it’d at least be fun to hear people argue about intangibles and subjective things like heart, passion, and enthusiasm, all while awkwardly avoiding interesting topics like grandstanding, race, ego, and arrogance.

To get back on topic, with Kobe finally winning NBA title number 4, it does solidify his legacy as an elite scorer and as someone who was able to get to the top of the mountain as the alpha dog. While I’m already sick of people trying to decide whether or not that means he’s in the same conversation as Michael Jordan, the championship (and the fact that the Lakers have to be considered the favorites for next year if they bring back Odom and Ariza) could be just the beginning of another Lakers dynasty.

(Now excuse me while I start fanning the Coach K to the Lakers flame, with Phil Jackson looking at retirement. Who else can LA bring in that will demand the respect of Kobe and company if Phil leaves?)

5 Responses

  1. [...] Mean Face Gone, Lakers Win Championship [...]

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  3. [...] 19, 2009 by roadtogameday Maybe I should stick with basketball predictions, as I was definitely early to the party for this [...]

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  5. Lakers factoid – of the 14 Hall of Famers who played for Lakers, 4 of them ended up coaching the team: John Kundla, Invoice Sharman, Pat Riley & Phil Johnson.

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